One thing we all have in common? Dealing with stress. At some point, everyone faces varying degrees of adversity, life challenges or a traumatic event that can threaten to derail us. 

From the accumulative stress of daily life to a sudden life-altering event, stressors can bring strong emotions and uncertainty, with each obstacle affects people differently. 

What is mental resilience?

Resilience is the ability to adapt and bounce back from life’s challenges and difficult experiences. Developing mental and emotional resilience requires flexibility to emerge stronger and healthier than before and can bring with it deep personal growth.

“Think of a tree that bends and flows with the winds and storms,” says geriatric psychiatrist and Assistant Vice Chancellor for Campus Wellness Steven Wengel, MD. “Resilience is that tree’s ability to bounce back from the stress of adverse conditions. While we can’t stop the storms of life, the question is how we will bounce back from them. It’s not about pretending the stress doesn’t affect us; it’s about how we recover.”

Being resilient also doesn’t mean we are unmoved by difficult circumstances or immune to experiencing emotional distress.

“When stressful events happen, it’s important to accept the things that happen to us without wishing them away while still committing to living out our values,” adds Dr. Wengel. “Acceptance and holding true to our values improves our mental flexibility and resilience.”

How to build mental resilience

Building mental resilience is like strengthening a muscle. “Increasing evidence shows that people who practice helpful self-care skills also build and maintain better mental health,” says Dr. Wengel. “These go hand-in-hand with developing greater resilience.”

To adjust to emotional challenges and cope with life’s stressors, focus on building healthy coping skills and enhancing resilience through small, daily steps. 

Focus on building one or two healthy habits at a time. This includes knowing our strengths, what we want to improve and allowing others to help us when needed.

• Take care of yourself physically. Eat nutritious food, get enough exercise and prioritize the sleep you need. Because stress also affects our body, caring for it helps us adapt to stress, reduce its effects and boost mental health.
• Take up a new hobby, engage in the arts or find purpose in helping others. Look for opportunities to explore new areas of interest. Discover and develop a new hobby to focus on and set goals. Consider volunteering to foster a sense of purpose and connection with others.
• Stay connected socially. Feelings of loneliness can affect your health. Family, friends and mentors can provide guidance and encouragement you can lean on in difficult times. Take a break from technology. Instead, prioritize relationships and build positive social connections that can offer support. 
• Practice gratitude, mindfulness and self-compassion. Write down what you are thankful for three times weekly in a gratitude journal to remind yourself of the positives in life. The act of writing things down is therapeutic. Pay attention to what’s happening within the moment, which can reduce stress and promote reflection and perspective. 
• Embrace challenges instead of avoiding difficult circumstances. Avoid negative thinking and harmful habits that mask your pain. Instead, face stress or setbacks head-on. Practice turning to healthy stress management methods instead of trying to mask negative feelings altogether. Learn from how you’ve found strength in the past and work to maintain a hopeful outlook.
• Take time to relax and enjoy nature. Get outside, take a walk and breathe fresh air. Studies have shown that contact with nature can boost our feelings of well-being, uplift emotions, increase positive thoughts, reduce stress and improve physical health. In short, spending time in nature supports positive mental health.
• Lean into faith or spiritual practices. Embracing a faith tradition or spiritual practice can help us connect with something bigger than ourselves. Practices like prayer and meditation can help restore hope in difficult circumstances, bring a sense of peace and build connections with others.
• Seek help when you need it. When we feel stuck, making progress can seem difficult to achieve. Joining a support group or seeking the help of a mental health professional can help develop a strategy for healing and moving forward.

Want to learn more about building resilience? Check out the Department of Health and Human Services free step-by-step guide with workbook pages.

For mental health emergencies, please call 988, America’s first three-digit number dedicated to mental health and substance use emergencies.